Criminals and ne’er-do-well people of Reddit, what were some crimes you committed that made you think (even if for a moment) that something supernatural/paranormal was going on?

Criminals and ne’er-do-well people of Reddit, what were some crimes you committed that made you think (even if for a moment) that something supernatural/paranormal was going on?

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44 thoughts on “Criminals and ne’er-do-well people of Reddit, what were some crimes you committed that made you think (even if for a moment) that something supernatural/paranormal was going on?

  1. Vondrehle February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I don’t know about crime, but I was once doing about 85 on a barren back country road in an old Cadillac when the interior lights suddenly came on and turned off again. I slowed down to check for an open door, when I came around a turn and found a broken down car in the middle of the lane with the lights off. Swerving in a ’77 Cadillac is no mean feat, and had I not slowed down I would have never had time to avoid a collision. Both doors were in fact closed, and it never happened again.

  2. adaminc February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Over a couple of weeks one summer, me and some friends (all middle school, grade 7-8) snuck into a nearby school at night and just fucked around, nothing damaging. Ate candy out of desks, ate ice cream out of the teachers lounge. Wrote notes to teachers and hid them in desks.

    The first night we went in I was going to go into the library, had the door open, but a friend said “no, don’t”. He claimed it wasn’t him who said it though, so we didn’t go in. After that night, the library doors were locked, so we couldn’t go in even though we wanted to.

    Then one night about 9 days later, our entrance, the roof top hatch, was locked. And we couldn’t get in anymore.

    The very next night, some guys got busted after climbing in through the library windows. It seems they had motion detectors inside the library. Pointing away from the door we would have entered, into the main area. Connected to a silent alarm.

    We would have been busted if not for whoever said those words.

  3. Merry_Dankmas February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    My friends and I used to climb the roof tops of buildings a lot in our early to mid teens. One of our favorite spots was the library by my house. It has a ladder on the back side with a gate blocking off the rungs but you could grab the top of the gate and pull yourself up if you jumped high enough. We’re all pretty tall so this isn’t too much of a challenge for any of us. We got to the top and were about to light our joint when we heard someone say “You boys better get down right now”. We all jumped and turned around but couldn’t see anyone. I hesitantly looked around the AC units and electrical boxes but couldn’t see anyone. I walked to the edge of the roof and looked down to the sidewalk below but couldn’t see anyone either. My friends and I scanned that entire roof top but couldn’t find a single person. It was a roof top so it’s not like they could have that many places to hide in the first place. It startled us enough that we decided to leave and get high somewhere else. I still have no idea who or what told us to get off the roof.

  4. KitCM February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    So I like to make these small wicker lighthouses, right…

  5. Tsar_family February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Me and my crimepartner did alot of stuff.
    Burglaries, robberies, thefts etc for like 5 years.

    We’re both Orthodox Christians, so once in a while we would go to church.

    Anyway, we’re walking up the stairs and I see people entering the church.

    The second we try to open the door, it’s locked.
    (Tourists around us were taking pictures and we were the only ones trying to get in).

    We walk away 20m and see people walking in there.

    Guess God didn’t want us in that day.

    This is something I’ll never forget.

  6. DeadPendulum February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I am a pretty talented pickpocket, slight cleptomania. Lifted a wallet from a man as I came up behind him on the street. Almost zero contact, no one should’ve noticed a thing but the man spoke out very calmly as I passed him, “could I have that back please?” Turned around to see he was wearing sunglasses. He lifted them up and revealed that he was blind. I was so completely dumbstruck and baffled that I apologized and gave him back the wallet. Wasn’t too worried about him picking me out of a line-up anyways, and didn’t wanna be that guy that steals from the handicapped.

    I guess his sense of touch was sharpened by the loss of sight or something like that. But for a brief second I was sure this man was a warlock.

  7. YeremyV February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I remember a creepy story with a similar theme like this.

    A guy was talking about how he’d squat in a house that had been put on the market. He had a key to get in because he knew the owners, and he’d sleep and shower there after work.

    He talked about how one night while he slept, the phone started ringing. He couldn’t figure out where it was coming from, and then he saw police cars pull up in the driveway. He hid while they scanned the windows and doors, and then booked it after they left.

    He later came back and said that the locks had been changed. He looked at the whole thing like the house was warning him he’d be kicked out.

  8. Iusedtostealthings February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    So I used to work as a security guard at a large office building. I often stole things like computers, desks, chairs etc from the offices. I was very careful and never took anything during my shift. There were only cameras in the lobby and on the outside of the building, not in any tenant spaces. One day I found a wallet in a desk and it had a few hundred dollars. I took the money and left the wallet. I wasn’t on that night, no one saw me enter or leave the building and I wasn’t on any camera. A few weeks later a lady I’d never seen before came up to the security desk and told me that she saw me take the money and even knew the exact amount. She said that she just wanted me to know that she knew. Then she left and I never saw her again. There is just no possible way she could have seen me.

  9. hippynoize February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Tried to kill someone and had an out of body experience during it. I’m not exactly faithful but I think something stopped me

    Edit: he raped my sister and tried to rape me when we were kids. It made me pretty fucked up for a long time. I figured I’d kill him then kill myself. Found him, beat him pretty good, tried to stomp his brains out and just had a moment of “snap the fuck out of this. This isn’t right.” Whatever it was, it wasn’t me. Either way, I’m doing a lot better since then. Back in school, healthy, married, doing the best I’ve ever done

  10. LudovicoSpecs February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    This one night I was boosting some silverware from this old lady’s house. She was home, but old people are pretty deaf and damn slow, so I didn’t give a shit. I hear this strange sound coming from the room where she’s watching tv (VOLUME WAY LOUD, GRANDMA), so I go look and she’s like having a seizure or some shit.

    I might be a thief, but I’m not a bastard, so I call 911. They answer. Shit. I don’t know what to say. “Hi, I was just robbing this old lady’s house and she’s having a seizure,” so I freeze and say nothing. I wait with her, but she stops seizing and then I hear sirens, so I hide in her tiny front hall closet with the foldy doors and shutters.

    Before the EMT’s arrive, she stops seizing. So by the time they get to her door, she seems fine, except confused why they’re at her house. They make nice, apologize and leave.

    As soon as they’re gone she starts seizing again. Fuck. So I call 911 again, just in case. Really don’t want a dead lady on my conscience. Same thing– sirens, she stops seizing, answers the door. It’s like a comedy at this point with me hiding in the closet, the bad guy with a heart of gold, but I’m not about to pop out and say, “But she was having a seizure!!” So they leave.

    Just as they drive away with her waving an old lady goodbye, she falls down and starts seizing again. Now it’s just sad/funny. Gotta call 911 again for grandma, but this time I’m thinking about leaving a note or something cause I do want to get the fuck out of there. I call. Wait for the sirens.

    Then she stops breathing. Fuck. FUCK. I’m thinking if I don’t get the fuck out of there, murder charge. I hide as the EMTs come through the door, put an oxygen mask on her and take her away. By this point, my adrenaline is through the roof and fuck it all, I feel like I’ve EARNED the right to take as much shit as I can walk out the door with and since the house is now empty, I can take my time going through her stuff, silverware, jewelry, cash in a shoebox– you name it, if I can find it, it’s mine. A fee for being a good samaritan.

    Fuck if the EMT doesn’t come back– who the fuck knows why. I hide again. He walks into the living room, turns the TV off and grabs a bag off her chair.

    This is the part that fucks me up.

    As he turns to go, an old man just appears OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE, pats him on the back and whispers something to him. But the EMT doesn’t react AT ALL– doesn’t turn around, doesn’t pause, just heads back out the door like the old man isn’t even there. Then the old guy GLIDES to the front window and stands there, waving goodbye.

    Then he disappeared.

    I’m standing in the closet frozen wondering what the fuck just happened and when I feel it. Somebody’s breathing down my neck.


    I started running, praying, crying, right out the fucking front door I didn’t care who saw. I ran like a bitch.

    To this day, whenever someone says “scared straight” I try not to remember the sound of that old man’s voice. But I always do.

  11. Quazios February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    What the actual hell is going on here?

  12. sannababy February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    So listen, I was in grad school and staying in this kind of shared house situation, with multiple other people in the house with me. I had been working with organic proteins late night in the lab using this big container of cow’s blood, and I was pretty exhausted (term paper due dates coming up, you know). I guess I must’ve slipped the package of cow’s blood into my backpack on accident because when I got home, I tripped a little coming into my house and it broke open, spilling cow’s blood all over the inside of my bag and the floor of the hallway. I ran to the kitchen to try and pour what was caught in my bag back into the container but ended up spilling even more of the blood on the kitchen floor. Exhausted and defeated, I walked upstairs still trailing blood, showered, and passed the fuck out. Eventually the police showed up– I guess one of my roommates woke up early, saw the blood, and assumed the worst– and I didn’t want to get in trouble for stealing from my uni’s lab, so I denied everything.

  13. Sensei10 February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    i suppose I broke into this one abandoned house once. It sat on the edge of the block and was behind a tall white wall, so you only saw what the yard looked like once you climbed over. Old shopping carts, toys, old dog house, kinda dreary. Door of the house had boards on it so had to pry those off with a crowbar. Once on the inside everything was black. It looked like the entire inside had been coated in soot, from the ceiling to the bathtub to the windows. Just all black. Thought that was weird. Anyway i spent a whole week there in the darkest point of winter, and im sure there was more than one reason i never got a night’s sleep

  14. spawnofbacon February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    One day I went to rob the house of an old lady. Got to the door, thought it was my lucky day- it was unlocked! So I quietly made my way to the living room and almost shit my pants- the old lady was sitting in silence, staring at some unknown presence in the garden, not moving at all. I didn’t want to be ghost food, so I left and now I only rob young ladies. Changed my life, man.

  15. DisjointedHarmony February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    A while ago I worked as a curtain repairman and was hired to fix a set of upstairs drapes for an older couple.

    What they didn’t tell me was that at the same time I was scheduled to come by, they would be out of town and have a house sitter who they didn’t inform of my presence.

    I parked my truck around back and went upstairs as they instructed me to, getting right to work. Next thing I know, a bunch of cops pull up to the house!

    I figure something must have happened in the neighborhood and I go back out to my truck right as they send two K-9’s inside! Good thing I left! Once they’re done investigating I return to the house to finish my job and start measuring the curtains.

    And they’re all out in the front yard staring at my window! Nosy people. I ignored them, repaired the curtains, packed everything up, and left.

    Some people just don’t appreciate the trades.

  16. shadowofzero February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    When I was 14 (33 now) I used to boost cars for this car theft ring in California. I did it for several months and never got caught. It was more of a thrill and lack of direction from living in a bad area and lack of supervision and authority in my life. I had never been arrested or got caught. I was always a good kid, but I rebelled after my parents split up. Anyways, there was one car that I needed to pick up and get delivered that day. The boss man was extremely insistent that the order needed to be filled within a few hours. It was another job like any other. But when I was about a mile away from my order, I got a very uneasy and disturbing feeling. Nothing was out of the ordinary or different from the dozens of other jobs I’d done. But I couldn’t shake the feeling. As I got closer to my destination, it was as if it just got noisier and more distracting (in my head). Finally that unsettling feeling overcame me and I bailed out. I saw the car and acted like I wasn’t paying attention. I didn’t do the job. I kept going and knew I was in deep shit with the boss guy. I decided to lay low because not filling an order was seriously bad news. That guy was not someone you disappointed or you would feel it. He was wrathful and on drugs. So I knew I had to hide for a while. 2 days of him blowing up my pager (yeah, that’s how long ago it was lol) then the calls and pages it suddenly stopped. Come to find out, word on the street was that the cops pulled a big sting operation and that car I was supposed to steal was being monitored. My old boss sent some other kid to get the car and they followed the kid back to the scrap yard and did a big bust. That guy got arrested. That kid got arrested. A whole boat load of people got pinched. But no one ever came for me. To this day, I know God was looking out for me. At that moment. At that time. And I listened. Since that incident, I never pulled any shit again. I straightened up, got back into school, and graduated with honors. It was all because of that weird, supernatural moment…

  17. WestwardDreamer February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    So, I’m not proud of this, alright? Husband and I work some long hours, and then when we’re home, so are the kids. There’s no “alone time,” if you get my meaning. One night, we finally manage to sneak away from the little hellions. I had the brilliant idea to give them my smart phone. It worked, and we’re going at it like it’s the last night on earth when we start to see some flashlights shining up from the driveway.

    We make ourselves decent, run through the house and go to confront these assholes. Only, they were police. *Someone* had dialed 911 and hung up. I probably should have said something, but they thought it was coming from that creepy old house in the woods, and no way in hell was I going to explain what really happened. I’d like to say that was the last time…

  18. RandomCashier75 February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Not a criminal but I’m a ne’er-do-well in the sense that I take anything free that I can (legally – often out of a free bin/free giveaway location).

    So, I went to the library – noticed free bundle of books in welcome lobby. Note: my habit is to always carry a bunch of bags in a backpack. After I put books I checked out into my car, I go back!

    No one else was there, but half the books from before vanished in less then a minute. I look around, but nope, gone. I still took the rest of the books.

  19. proddy February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I had just created a suit that rendered me completely invisible to the human eye, but what about the mechanical? I decided to test the suit at the thrift shop closeby to my home/lab. I waited inside a clothes rack until the store closed and the owner went home.

    I actually fell asleep waiting and woke up pretty late or early I suppose.

    I peeked out from between some dresses and slowly stood up. I saw the glow of the motion sensor as it was triggered. I freeze. It turns off again. I wave my arms, walk around a bit. Nothing.

    The suit works just like 007’s invisible car in Tomorrow Never Dies. I suspect it doesnt hold up under quick motion. One way to find out.

    I sprint through the floor. Nothing. A huge success! But maybe it was a fluke. I sprint back and forth a few times, still nothing from the motion sensors. On my last test I brushed against a few dress racks as I almost fall from exhaustion. Now the sensors light up. Shit.

    Actually maybe this is a good thing. I didn’t think of an exit plan when I was done testing. I was gonna wait till morning then walk out. But now maybe I can slip by the cops if they show up to check the sensors.

    The cops showed up 20 minutes later. One of them shone his light right at me. I walked out the door they came in and gave a mocking wave as I headed back home.

  20. _winterofdiscontent_ February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Clearly not a [SERIOUS] post, for those who are currently confused.

  21. HoelessJoe February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    TIL find a recent /r/AskReddit post and reverse it, instant karma.

  22. TheHancock February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Such a troll askreddit… I approve.

  23. ArrayedFracture February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    When I was a kid I lived in a little hamlet next to a camping area. Right at the opposite side of the camping area was a rather large, seemingly abandoned house.

    At the time I was kinda into urban exploring but I wasn’t at the point where I’d “break i to” buildings just in case maybe it was just a poorly maintained building with inactive occupants or squatted by questionable people.

    So I wandered on the property for a bit, climb trees near the house and look at the building wondering about its story. I’m on the biggest tree on the property, against a wall overlooking the camping area when one of the windows on the third floor suddenly explodes. There were no warning, I hadn’t seen any lights or movements i the house, I don’t remember hearing an impact sound or anything just straight up loud shatter noise and the window being completely gone.

    After a couple of seconds I heard gravel moving behind me in the camping side, so I turn around and see two guys inching towards me. They notice that I’ve seen them and one of them yells to someone else to call the cops while they grab me. I jumped off the tree and made a dash through the forest surrounding my hamlet, the camping site, and the “abandoned” house before making a loop around my hamlet and hiding between houses to lose them.

    I don’t really think it’s supernatural per se but I still can’t exactly think of a reason why the whole window would just blow up. If the guys behind me had thrown a rock in my direction, missed me, and ended up hitting the window, I feel like I’d have heard some of that and only one of the window panels would’ve shattered, not the whole window.

  24. DisjointedHarmony February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I live in a pre Civil War town, just down the street from an old museum. Well, what most people don’t know is that nobody ever bothered to put a lock on the side door leading into the pantry/kitchen. That place has some of the best colonial pastries and meat pies in the South! I haven’t bought groceries in probably 30 years because they always have a fully stocked kitchen.

    I have to be careful, though. Sometimes my rooting is interrupted by a nosy neighbor calling the cops while I’m busy stuffing treats into my pantaloons. I have to book it out of there and never have time to close the cabinets, dammit!

  25. Oak987 February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Few people know, and I am speaking on condition of anonimity, that Elon Musk died two years ago from a rare bone marrow cancer. But he had his brain kryogenically frozen and then implanted into a machine that supports his biological brain function. The machine is connected to the internet and that is how he is able to communicate to the outside world and to a team of his personal assistants, who take care of the machine and communicate with Elon’s key management and some of the employees.

    Elon’s dying wish was to have his body buried on Mars. When he first found out that he was going to die several years ago, he asked NASA if they could send his body to Mars. They said they had no capability to do that. They joked that he should start his own space program. But Elon did not find that joke funny. He went ahead and started his own space program.

    So you see, all the rumors that there is a body in the trunk of the car are true. But it’s his own body.

  26. obtrae February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    My company requested me to retrieve some information from a government agency. So I hired a pety thief to do the deed and steal employee data from their data center. He must have misheard because he said that he went in search for a safe instead of the data center. The guy came back claiming that he couldn’t get the job done, and that he was raped. I called b.s., we hired a medical guy to use a rape kit to see if the criminal was telling the truth or not. Turns out, we found animal hair on and in the guy. The DNA was similar to a bear and human, but neither a bear nor human. Could it have been big foot?

  27. TerminalNobRot February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I was trying to scare some local kids away from a development plot I bought with misappropriated funds. It included an old rundown mansion, as well as a few other assorted outbuildings and a small graveyard, all of which I was intending to build on. Well, word got around that something was going on, some investigators turned up and things got a little out of hand. I tried to get rid of them by dressing in sheets and rattling chains when they came snooping around my property but it didn’t deter them one bit, if anything it made them more determined to get to the bottom of the mystery. I thought I would up the ante the next night by physically assaulting them in the dark and then raising my arms menacingly when they shone their flashlights at me. Well, they noped the fuck out of there so fast they left their auras behind! As I gave chase, they ran through the first door on the right but, and I shit you not, before I could follow them through they came back out the third door on the left! At this point I’m standing there scratching my head, looking quizzical (as far as a unscrupulous, middle-aged property developer with a sheet over his head can anyway), when fuck me sideways, the dopey looking one of the group pops his head out of a chest drawers in the middle of the hallway! Well that was enough for me to just go back home to my wife and kids and re-evaluate my life choices. Was there a rational explanation? I wouldn’t like to hazard a guess.

  28. Kanaraketti February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Back in high school a group of friends and I would break into recently built houses in our subdivision and use it for small parties/smoking before school. Anyways, one morning I was inside smoking a bowl before my bus arrived and heard someone that sounded like an older lady in one of the front rooms say, “You better get out of here.” I was alone in the house and it was maybe 7:30am, being the little rebel I was and legitimately confused as to who would be in the house so early, I went and checked the rooms. Of course there wasn’t anyone inside and I never went back to that particular house. I’ve lived in the same subdivision for years and multiple families have moved in just to move out months or even weeks later.

  29. averageuser81 February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I was 17. I had decided on the way home from school I was going to slam my car head on into a light pole… hopefully kill myself. As i rev my car, I hear a loud shotgun sound. My back right tire blew out. My dad came to help me change it. I thought that oddly coincidental.

  30. WhyPanicJustChill February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Criminal here.

    Partner and I were scouting out a house to rob. Elderly guy, nobody had seen him in a few days, mail over flowing in mailbox, missed a doctor’s appointment, car hasn’t moved, etc. We both know we are about to find a body or empty house which we could easily rob. We arrive on scene, look through the window and sure enough, we can see his foot on the floor in the living room. My partner is a seasoned rober and pulls rank and makes me go first. Door is unlocked and as soon as we open it we smell a mostly fresh dead body. Almost relieved, we both enter and he tells me to check vitals on dead dude. He is obviously dead, with lividity, dried feces on him and dried saliva around his mouth. So I go to stand over him and see if I can get a pulse at which point he takes a deep breath, rolls over, and asks why we are in his house. At this point we both start screaming oh shits and what the fucks as we both run out of the house. I only managed to grab a silver spoon. I think he died a week later in the hospital. I still get jokes about raising the dead.

  31. DisjointedHarmony February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    When I was incarcerated I used to crawl around inside the prison’s air ducts out of boredom (think those insulated tunnels running throughout the ceiling)

    Well one night I got stuck above another inmates cell and yelled “help”, hoping somebody would come along and free me.

    But by the time the patrolman came along I had wiggled out. Whew.

  32. Mrpig1886 February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I was helping move coke (allegedly) to queens.i was about to get on the subway on 14th street when I bumped into an ex who is into tarot and sprits( long story) etc.after missing a couple trains we parted ways.when I arrived at building in queens the cops raided the room five minutes prior. I bought a pack of tarot cards just out of respect.

  33. Xdegenerate February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I was hired by an anonomus person to break into Area 51 and steal a document from a safe.

    I was busted by Bigfoot who flushed my head down the toilet then gave me a prostate exam. Bigfoot has huge fingers…. it hurt badly…. never again.

  34. rakeitup February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    This thread is actually incredible.

    This is why you use a [Serious] tag, reddit.

  35. Tisias February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Alright, guv’na. I was tooling around Baker street in London, looking to perpetrate some the old skullduggery after this detective bloke left out of his flat with this doctor friend of his that he was makin’ the amorous congress with. So, after they get done playing the old blanket hornpipe and leave, I enter all discrete and clever. Go through the place. Snatch his cache of cocaine, the guy is rotten sodding addict, but then see notes of a case he was working. Something about a hellish spectral hound. Freaked me out right proper that did. I spilled of there fast and never looked back. Took up honest work as a chimney sweep after that, I did.

  36. Badlay February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Use to grow a little weed and party on a plot of farmland in wisconsin.

    We would have friends up every memorial day and would camp off the side of an off road loop where we created a camp spot. Canoeing, partying, binge drinking.

    One night I took my 89 chevy blazer with a carload of people to the river for a swim. On the way back I was driving like an ass hole on the trail sending people bouncing all over. on purpose. And continued to carry on around the loop passed the camp spot when someone from the back grabbed me and pulled me back in my driver seat and yelled “STOP!!” I slammed on the breaks and everyone went flying forward. Threw it in reverse and made a 3 point turn to pull in and park at the camp spot. The passengers had enough and didnt want to pass up the tents and fresh beer. All poured out of the car laughing

    A few minutes go buy and Mike is yelling at something on the trail.. I go over there and in the dirt passed out cold with mud on his face from my front tire was was drunken friend of ours. I immediately started freaking out screaming how if Mike didnt see him and tell me to stop you would be dead. If I didnt pull in reverse after stopping he would be dead. I was kicking him and pissed until mike stopped me to say he did see shit. NOBODY SAW SHIT AND NOBODY GRABBED ME.

    But sure as shit I swear on my children something grabbed me and yelled at e to stop and saved his life that night.

  37. Maiq_The_Deciever February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    Back in high school me and my friends liked to go places we shouldn’t and smoke pot. So on 4/20 one year we all go to our old elementary school at like 10:30 at night to blaze it. Since it was so late we were kinda trespassing. On the way there my friend, whose mom worked at the school, told us about how one of the old janitors told his mom that a long time ago a girl died in a landslide on the hill behind the school. So we are walking around the buildings when suddenly we hear a very loud, clear little girl scream coming from the direction of the playground, which would make sense if it wasn’t 10:30 on a school night. It was one of those moments out of a movie, were we all just looked at each other mouth agape, and booked it out of there as fast as possible.

  38. jamesfishingaccount February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I grew up in a small town and me and some friends made it our goal one summer to break into every building possible at night. Wedidn’t want to steal anything or actually break anything to get in, it was more of a test of our ability to pick locks or create ways during the day that would make it easy to get in at night. We got into the elementary school one night, there was rumors of a bomb shelter in the basement so we had to check it out. It was true, the basement ‘janitor closet’ had a big ass metal door and inside there was some bomb shelter warning and instructional stuff along with regular janitor equipment. Nothing interesting or crazy happened while we were in the school and we left after a short period of time. We hung out on the playground equipment afterword. At around 1am while we’re just hanging out there is a tapping sound from the 3rd floor window and we all stopped talking and looked up. I couldn’t see anything in the window and then BAM! BAm! BAM! 3 incredibly loud slams against the window. The window was shaking but still nothing to be seen, we ran to the closest friends house because it scared the bejesus out of all of us.

  39. Michael732 February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I love put 50 cents in a candy machine for a Snikers.rwo fell out. The candy God’s were with me that day.

  40. RandomGuyPDF February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I’m wondering if any of these stories is actually true, but is being passed as a joke because of the meta context of this thread.

  41. BeachCop February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I got stopped by a Trooper once for speeding (I’m a rebel. Chicks dig rebels.) and he let me go with a warning. Had to be some supernatural phenomenon at work there.

  42. Rndomguytf February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I don’t have an answer, but I’m gonna start calling people ne’er-do-well folks from now on.

    “How’s my favourite ne’er-do-well ruffian going?”

  43. DisjointedHarmony February 12, 2018 / 10:38 am

    I’m not a criminal. Perish the thought. However, when I was a young mother living near Prince Edward Island in Canada, my baby had a bad case of gas and I couldn’t get him to stop fussing.

    Well, I suppose somebody called the cops on me thinking I was an abusive asshole and they showed up poking around our property. Well, Baby caught a glimpse of their shiny badges and was instantly entertained. My eardrums welcomed the break.

    But then, they started to leave and Baby started fussing again! Ugh! Someone called them a second time, they came back, and Baby was once again quiet while being entertained by their shiny badges and flashing lights. Then they left *a second time* and it was back to Fuss City for me!

    This went on for a while until they finally left for good and my husband came home with gas drops for the little one. But man, if that wasn’t annoying!

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