56 thoughts on “What are some “green flags” that someone’s a good person?

  1. TheRealRedCloud March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    I recently sat next to a guy on a plane who picked up a fallen book from the passenger next to him who fell asleep. He not only picked it up but marked the page and then held it in his hands until she woke up because there was no where to place it.

    Then I found out he was Canadian and it all made sense.

  2. PandaDerZwote March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They understand that people fuck up sometimes.
    There are many people out there who just wait for fuck ups so that they can guilt someone with them. Guess that would be the red flag to that green flag.

  3. Kitski March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They treat everyone equally, regardless of the other person’s status/job/popularity/anything else.

  4. WraithCadmus March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They’re willing to admit they’re wrong and re-evaluate their stance on something.

    N.B. – If you hold this against them you are an arsehole.

  5. pickmetoo March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    If somebody is getting talked over, they actively make sure the person gets to say what they wanted to say

  6. Frolic-A-holic March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They can accept when they are wrong about something without getting angry or defensive.

  7. DukeInterior March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Those little casual acts of kindness that they do on automatic. Holding a door for someone, helping someone if they drop something. Just a default attitude of pleasantness and support to everyone they meet.

  8. ArchetypicalDegen March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    When they actually ask you followup questions when talking to you, rather than just switching straight to their own answer.

  9. jerget March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    You can tell them bad news and they wont make the conversation about themselves

  10. NuclearCandy March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    If they’ve committed to do something a while ago, they’ll bring it up without having to be reminded.

    “Hey, here’s that $20 I borrowed from you a few weeks ago, thanks!”


    “Hey, I haven’t forgotten that I owe you $20, but I forgot to hit the ATM on the way over and don’t have any cash on me, sorry about that. Is it okay if I bring it by next time or do you need it sooner?”

    Similar situation if they’ve committed to go somewhere with you or do something for you. Just reminding you that it wasn’t an empty promise, and that they still intend to fulfill it even if they can’t at that moment, shows that a person stands by their word.

    A lot of people get anxious over reminding someone that they’ve been promised something, and it’s nice if the person brings it up themselves.

  11. Kaolin- March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They don’t somehow make every conversation about them.

    Basically, the opposite of answers on “red flags” threads.

  12. Whackjob-KSP March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They do the right thing even when they think nobody is watching.

    EDIT: RIP inbox. Thanks, folks!

    EDIT EDIT: Thanks for the gold.

  13. kitten1218 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Aw, this thread made me really happy. I’m gonna try and do some of these tomorrow.

    edit: I wrote this at 3 am in my time zone, I don’t need any more responses telling me I need to start today. I appreciate the sentiment, but it does feel kind of self-righteous to be honest.

  14. xfjqvyks March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Shout out all the psychopaths in here with a pen and pad taking notes on how to beat the system

    edit: Thanks for the gold ^^keep ^^an ^^^eye ^^^on ^^^^this ^^^^guy ^^^^^in ^^^^^particular

  15. and_so_forth March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    If you accidentally fart and they don’t make a big deal out of it.

    Notable exception: if you accidentally fart and they make a huge deal out of it and never shut the fuck up about it, that person is probably your best friend.

  16. Oneiropolisi March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They’ll check up on you to see how you’re doing, and will offer their support if you need it.

  17. aquilosanctus March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They value and respect you for being you, rather than expecting you to be fit some mold.

  18. BrianHotshot March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    The remember things that you’ve talked about, or something that happened before.

    Also, they’re good at listening, and are willing to keep up conversation.


    Edit: So as a clarification, the things I listed are just easy signs that the person may be the so-called “good person”. Just because someone does not exhibit these signs does not automatically make them a “bad person” in any way. The attributes I listed are just some “green-lights” (as the question asks for). It cannot, however, be concluded that failure to meet these “green-lights” automatically results in a “red-light”.

  19. Floofeh March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    This thread actually makes me feel good about myself. I tend to be really harsh on myself for not doing *enough*, but I see so many things here that I do that I don’t really realize. I needed that bit of validation today, thank you!

  20. CleverUserNameB March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They wave acknowledgment of you when you stop for them as they cross at a crosswalk.

    They casually pick up a piece of stray trash as they’re walking.

    They make eye contact and exchange a friendly smile, nod of the head, or “hello” in passing.

    They hold a door open for you or thank you when you do it for them.

    I should note these are intended for strangers, people you don’t already know.

  21. I_Zeig_I March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Selflessness. After knowing my at the time fwb for less than 2 months I was diagnosed with cancer. Guess who slept in the hospital bed with me each night and came back everyday with cookies and baked goods. Made sure she was my gf right away.

    I was already planning to, and my diagnosis ended up not being fatal. Still together almost 3 years now 🙂

  22. rosedition March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    I met a new friend last month at a conference and she suggested we have dinner after one of the seminars. I agreed but after the 8 hour long day I just felt like knocking out on the couch. She came up to me after the seminar and asked if I still wanted to grab dinner but I told her I was really tired. She smiled and said it was totally fine and she would just order in too probably. I just liked how she didn’t get defensive like how others do when you cancel plans. It shows that she’s empathetic.

  23. Saxon-Landshark March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They take an active interest in your life and remember what is going on for you, and your special events. It’s not all about them.

    They can give and take. Pay bills and take gifts, give and accept compliments etc.

    People who actively look out for you and your interests. Not in an invested manner, but in a sounding board way, providing feedback as to if the new partner is behaving well, job is shit etc. Someone to give an outside opinion – and trusted!

  24. SpermWhale March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    if they don’t throw their trash in the ocean

  25. Pureey March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Huh. It turns out I’m a better person than I thought, based on these answers.

    My answer: Something I’ve noticed in a lot of people is that if you’re very nice to them for a long enough amount of time and try to be understanding of them, they’ll eventually begin to take it for granted and stop putting effort into being nice back because they can believe they can get away with it. The people who never reach that point are people I believe to be truly good.

    Also, people who at least try to be humble about how good they are at something or in some way, even if they do a poor job of actually appearing humble.

  26. bloom12 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    When they meet your disabled family members for the first time and treats them no different from anybody else.

  27. Kherus1 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    My wife saw ONE FUCKING EPISODE of wife swap or trading spouses or some bullshit where a woman says “You know a mans a good man if he feeds you the last piece of his cake.”

    To this fucking day, if I want to avoid hearing a re-run of that sound byte, I have to abstain from enjoying a whole piece of cake. I must make myself remember that I’m supposed to be her shining knight and for some reason THIS qualifies above everything else!

    And cake…is like my favorite fucking thing!

    Fuck you reality television!

  28. Reanimation809 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    **They treat minimum wage employees kindly and considerately.**
    That’s a *big* one.

  29. elij7 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They are willing to always accept when they’re wrong, and don’t mind apologising for it.

  30. Alejandro4891 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    when i started my last job, one of my now former co-workers would regularly share her food with me. i don’t know why, she just did. it made me feel welcomed and further down the line her and i became fairly close.

  31. 2moreX March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Not insulting my mother after getting Headshot all across the map.

  32. ToyVaren March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Never engaging in one-upmanship, even passive aggressively.

  33. InGordWeTrust March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They’re a host of a party and want to make sure everyone is having a good time. They connect wallflowers with other people there, all while looking after people, and cleaning up.

  34. Phrankespo March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Do something good without expecting recognition

  35. GeorgeThe13th March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They smile at children, in a totally non creepy way.

  36. KingNewbie March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    Buried for sure, but they argue with respect. Disagreements are common, but how a person responds to differences of opinion says a lot about them.

  37. Astarax March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    When they are able to take criticism, reflect on their actions and try to make improvements.

  38. Weep2D2 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They give you the player 1 controller when you’re at their house.

    edit: They also don’t say things like,
    “I’ve never played the game before”

    ..followed immediately by an intensity of wavedashing.

  39. SuperCrazy813 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    How they treat people that wait on them. Like waiters and waitresses.

  40. phox389 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    If random people walk up to you and ask “oh are you on a date with that guy?” and proceed to tell you how he’s the nicest person they know (as opposed to warning you about something), either he’s a great guy or it’s an elaborate hoax.

  41. Bunit117 March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    If they’re polite to waiters and service workers. Seriously, you don’t need to spy on people’s privacy to know if they’re a good or bad person. They’ll publicly telegraph exactly who they are the second they know they can freely treat another human being like shit and not suffer any consequences for doing so.

  42. lulicat March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    when they respect your space. for example, wait for you to respond to something instead of prompting you for a reply with another text, call, message on another type of app. intrusion shows they feel their needs are more important than yours and that they want to force you into compliance.

  43. RaptorWithAMustache March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    No littering.

    No raising voice in public places.

    No being unpolite and condescending towards servers and clerks.

  44. axolotlsaffect March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    empathy, empathy, empathy

    Did I mention empathy?

  45. ByeByeFlutterPie March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    If they are willing to help others regardless of what minority or majority they are a part of.

  46. MedschoolgirlMadison March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    How they treat waiters, baristas, people at the concierge, ushers, dog walkers, street sweepers or even cafeteria workers is a flag on a person’s character. Also how they treat animals.

    Edit: My point with animals came from the time I volunteered in a shelter before, there are pets abandoned there because they are old and they stopped being cute. My parents raised me to think that pets are part of the family, you just don’t give up on them when they get sick.

  47. InvMiqx March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    They show you their memes

  48. theDonutpanda March 14, 2018 / 3:34 pm

    How they treat other people’s children that are not related to them.

    It’s easy to be nice to family but it takes something else to be nice to strangers even more so their children.

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